At times, I think I’m an expert in stealing time. Time in between time. For example, I love to read while waiting for my ‘driver’ to pick me up from work. I would normally read novel or journal papers depending on my mood. I also love to read while waiting for my students to finish their work. That normally I read journal papers. I would find myself using whatever in between time I can find to do something rather than wool-gathering, which I also did sometimes when I was overly stressed. At work, I would steal time during lunch to try to work on my writing, but so far, no real success yet. I’m quite disappointed with myself.
The need to start writing is so intense that I believe my subconscious mind is killing my sleep. Yet, the push to really write isn’t there. This kind of mind battle (between the need to write and actually writing) keeps me restless. I know it’s a problem that I need to face but somehow I tried to postpone facing it by doing something else. My time-stealing is one way to divert my mind, in telling it that I did something though it’s not significant enough to make progress. Sigh! I really don’t know. This mind battle is exhausting. I need to do something about it NOW.